It’s been a week of half-conceived not-yet-written blog posts. The post that’s still overdue from December (pictures of my humbug-advent-calendar, hand-sewn stockings and Finn’s birthday cake). Another look-what-I-dyed post (floss in choc-mint and mixed-berry, can you tell I’m a sweet-tooth?!). An OMG-Niamh-is-8-months-old-can-you-believe-it post (she is! Can you believe it?!).
And a one-year-on since Laura died post.
But about that, I really don’t know what to say at all. I have thought so much about her lately. About her life, and her death, and about how differently people react to and move forward (or not) from suicide. (This from a much closer-to-home perspective also, as we recently marked one year since my young cousin took his life). About advice Laura gave me that I sometimes forget to take. About the beautiful quilt we made in her memory. I don’t think any profound understanding has come of all this reflection, but suddenly now that the anniversary is here (though yesterday and gone already, by our time), I feel a lot more at peace. I simply wish the same peace for everyone who grieves for Laura.
It’s hard to believe that a year has passed already. The quilt is a wonderful tribute to how loved she was.
I hope that Laura’s family has been able to take as much solace from looking at the quilt as we did in stitching for it. May she never be forgotten.
I’ve been having a hard time with this, too. It really bothers me that Neil is already engaged, and at the same time, I feel guilty for being angry with him for being able to move on. Some part of me feels very protective of Laura and I’m not sure if it’s the same part that wonders if Neil’s ease in moving on is at all connected with Laura’s reasons for choosing to leave.